Dec. 29, 2002 - Get The Door - It's Tiny Cute Puppies.
Dec. 28, 2002 - Crossdressing Is Good For You.
Dec. 26, 2002 - Obey Your Fart.
Dec. 23, 2002 - Be Like Dad, Keep Holiday Excrement.
Dec. 22, 2002 - When The Going Gets Tough, The Tough Get Prison Sex.
Dec. 19, 2002 - Tense, Nervous, Rectal Thermometer?
Dec. 18, 2002 - Behold the Power of Penis.
Dec. 14, 2002 - Mild Green Malkav The Jester's Pet Peeves Liquid.
Dec. 12, 2002 - Moving at the Speed of Crud.
Dec. 07, 2002 - Follow-Up to the Last Entry
Dec. 05, 2002 - How Many Licks Does it Take to Get to the Center of a Suck-Ass Weasel?
Dec. 05, 2002 - Because Necrophilia is Complicated Enough.
Dec. 04, 2002 - With A Name Like Malkav The Jester's Pet Peeves, It Has To Be Good.
Dec. 03, 2002 - Dude, You're Getting a Butt Monkey!
Nov. 29, 2002 - A Day Without Coolio is Like a Day Without Sunshine.
Nov. 26, 2002 - Snap! Crackle! Turkey Rectums!
Nov. 24, 2002 - Anal Rape - The Best A Man Can Get.
Nov. 22, 2002 - Jesus-Lickin' Good
Nov. 18, 2002 - I Saw Goat Sex and I Thought of You.
Nov. 14, 2002 - Um...okay then...
Nov. 11, 2002 - And then, he married the chicken...
Oct. 30, 2002 - Got wrapped up and squeezed to death by the Reading Rainbow...dangit...
Monday, Oct. 28, 2002 - My Diaryland Trading Card
Oct. 27, 2002 - Geek Crossing
Oct. 27, 2002 - Great, now it's lodged in my skull.
Oct. 27, 2002 - Shhhh! Okay, okay, now act sober...
Oct. 23, 2002 - This is a bit longer than usual, and filled with pain and geekiness. Read at your own risk.
Fri, Oct 18, 2002 - 'Tis the season for new appliances. Fa la la la la, la la la CLUNK!
Oct 17, 2002 - Geek. Geek geek geek, geek geek. Geek!
Oct. 06, 2002 - Contrary to popular belief, it is NOT beginning to look a lot like Christmas...
Oct. 05, 2002 - No one understands my hair. No one but Bob, my stylist. And James Spader. Me and Bob and James, we're the only ones. No one else. Just us.
Oct. 04, 2002 - Words To Live By
Oct. 02, 2002 - Don't bother looking for me. I'm under the pile of dust and books. On the floor. Yes, the pile that's whimpering.
Sept. 30, 2002 - I'm so tired I can't even think of a good way to describe this entry for the "older links" page
Sept. 29, 2002 - Oh wow! A washing machine! Oh wow! Another one!
Sept. 24, 2002 - The night was going so well, until the mimes landed...
Sept. 19, 2002 - Malkav the Jester's Pet Peeves Surprisingly Do Not Include Keelhauling
Sept. 12, 2002 - I have no clue what to call this one...
Sept. 11, 2002 - Reese's Introduces The New Candy Bar For 2003: Reese's Prozac Butter Cups! Mmm...Chocolatey...Peanut Buttery...H-haaaappeeeee...
Sept. 05, 2002 - Screaming. Again.
Sept. 02, 2002 - Recipe for Disaster
Aug. 25, 2002 - Just a steel town girl on a Saturday night
Aug. 24, 2002 - Nonsense. Random, utter nonsense. You'll be sorry. Really.
Aug. 16, 2002 - Thursday, The Day That Wouldn't End Ever Ever Ever
Aug. 12, 2002 - Fatigue, Irritability, Bitchiness, and Eventual Demise
Aug. 11, 2002 - Crazy People Theatre Presents: A Mime's Tale
Aug. 09, 2002 - Why yes, I have gone completely insane. How about yourself?
Aug. 08, 2002 - Randomness All Over The Place
Aug. 04, 2002 - A Killing Spree! A Killing Spree!
Aug. 02, 2002 - Wow, it's so quiet in here you can hear the crickets chirping! I mean, if there were crickets in my computer. Which there are.
Jul. 29, 2002 - Booger
Jul. 20, 2002 - Yes Friends, It's the Return of Malkav the Jester's Pet Peeves!
Jul. 14, 2002 - Spam my erstwhile booty! That's right! SPAM IT!!!
Jul. 11, 2002 - The Suck-Ass Weasel (does not appear in this entry more than twice)
Jul. 08, 2002 - Great, now I have to order their F!@#in' CD.
Jul. 07, 2002 - "No! NO!! Kitchen bring pain!"
Jul. 06, 2002 - Yay! Clap Hands, Squeal With Glee! In A Geeky Sorta Way...
Jul. 05, 2002 - In Which the Jester Snarls a Bit About Life In General
Jul. 01, 2002 - Take my advice: Just nod and smile and no one will get hurt.
Jun. 30, 2002 - Oh, the humanity! It nearly crushed my poor, fragile little spirit!
Jun. 22, 2002 - News From Vagina, Part Cucumber
Jun. 21, 2002 - News From Vagina, Part One
Jun. 18, 2002 - And now, please share with me the unparallelled rapture that is a Weird Al song...
Jun. 15, 2002 - George Lucas Is A Big Fat Hairy Smelly Communist
Jun. 14, 2002 - Either somebody up there loves me, or somebody at the Diet Coke factory reads my journal
Jun. 13, 2002 - Long and Probably Boring
Jun. 11, 2002 - "There's travel in your future when your tongue freezes to the back of a speeding bus/Fill that void in your pathetic life by playing Whack-A-Mole 17 hours a day."
Jun. 10, 2002 - Random Bitching
Jun. 06, 2002 - Screaming For No Good Reason
May. 31, 2002 - "I BEEN down/I BEEN down/To the bottom of ev'ry GACK!"
May. 30, 2002 - Spiders and Crap
May. 27, 2002 - Musings in the Night
May. 26, 2002 - Shameless Plug
May. 24, 2002 - Malkav the Jester's Pet Peeves!
May. 18, 2002 - Malkav the Jester's Science Lesson of the Day!
May. 14, 2002 - If I'm alone in this room, where is that mooing coming from?
May. 10, 2002 - My Inner Xander wears gray, slightly bloodstained pajamas
May. 10, 2002 - Um...
May. 08, 2002 - Zoot has been lighting our beacon, which, as I've just remembered, is Grail-shaped...
May. 03, 2002 - Is there life after life? Inquiring minds want to throw up.
Apr. 29, 2002 - Kevin, Kevin, Wherefore Art Thou Kevin?
Apr. 26, 2002 - Please don't read this...
Apr. 26, 2002 - WHY GOD?!? WHY!?!?!
Apr. 22, 2002 - The Jester's House of Psychological Evaluation and Peanut Butter
Apr. 20, 2002 - Eyargh! (And other pirate-like noises)
Apr. 17, 2002 - Psychotropic Ketchup
Mar. 24, 2002 - Crud Vapors
Mar. 18, 2002 - Countdown Suspended Due To Arrival
Mar. 11, 2002 - Spoon!
Mar. 10, 2002 - A Bunch Of Crap, As I Am Very Tired
Mar. 08, 2002 - That's right folks...move along now...nothing more to see here...
Mar. 07, 2002 - Good News and Bad News
Mar. 05, 2002 - What the fuck? I mean, seriously, what the fuck?
Mar. 05, 2002 - I Must Be Out Of My Mind
Mar. 03, 2002 - Entry of Infinite Peril
Mar. 02, 2002 - "Wow, your butt is so red! Looks great." "Thanks. I've been eating a lot of fiber. You know...um...sweaters and stuff..."
Mar. 01, 2002 - A Very Pagan-Centric Entry
Feb. 28, 2002 - Vagina Muthafuckahs!
Feb. 26, 2002 - Praying For Lightning To Strike Me
Feb. 24, 2002 - Please Jester, Don't Cause 'Em to Die a Gruesome Death with Screaming and Crying and Begging and Pleading and Blood and Pain and Hot Pokers
Feb. 23, 2002 - Twitch...Twitch...Twitch...
Feb. 20, 2002 - Ramble, Ramble, Ramble, Blah, Blah, Blah
Feb. 18, 2002 - This Has Been a Test of the Emergency HTML System. This Is Only a Test. BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!
Feb. 17, 2002 - Funny Weather We're Havin', Ain't It?
Feb. 17, 2002 - Dear Penthouse Forum: I Never Thought It Could Happen To Me...
Feb. 14, 2002 - Confessions of a Campus Malkavian
Feb. 10, 2002 - The Elk Reserved a Table, a Hotel Room, and a Male Prostitute.
Feb. 10, 2002 - What is all this about sex? Why? Why? Why?
Feb. 09, 2002 - Yet Another Link to a Random Location Somewhere In The Universe!
Feb. 02, 2002 - The Jester Mentions Several Body Parts You May or May Not Wish To Hear About
Jan. 29, 2002 - Like a Poke in the Brain With a Sharp Stick
Jan. 28, 2002 - Ah, Sports! That Most Effective Manner of Removing Unfit Breeders From the Gene Pool!
Jan. 26, 2002 - Caution: Enter At Your Own Risk!
Jan. 25, 2002 - Get Down and Boogie, And Play That Funky Music till You Die!
Jan. 22, 2002 - "So I says to the Girl Scout, 'How much for a box of shortbreads?' And the Girl Scout says 'Oohh...gonna need about...tree fity.' And I says, 'You ain't no Girl Scout! You dat dere Loch Ness Monster!'"
Jan. 20, 2002 - I Don't Know If This Makes Any Sense, But...
Jan. 17, 2002 - A Really Funny Title That Hints At The Point Of The Entry
Jan. 11, 2002 - The Jester Returns and Gets a Little Depressing and Weird